I see it every time I walk out the door.

Even if it's just to get the mail with him on my hip, it's the most obvious thing.

I cannot walk into a grocery store holding my own baby brother without feeling judged.

My family cannot be anywhere in public without feeling judged.

And it's hard to feel that way every moment of your life in public.

It's hard to feel as if your every movement is being watched and judged.

It's hard to feel as if God is allowing people to judge you.

But maybe that's just the beauty of it.

Maybe it's God's way of saying they will judge you and they will persecute you.

It is not always words that hurt.  It is eyes and thoughts.  Judgment is a feeling.  You can feel it through others.

But God does not promise us a dandy time doing what He calls us to do.  He doesn't promise a life of ease just because we obeyed Him.  And although the blessing is huge, God is using the stares, the judgmental eyes, all to say,

This world that you are a part of.... it is an evil place... and though you obeyed Me.... I am only showing you that there is nowhere that will be equivalent to My kingdom.

& they will stare.  & they will persecute.  & they will mock.  & they will question.  & they will judge.

But I will persevere.

For following His calling is not in vain.

Olivia  – (January 17, 2013 at 11:08 PM)  

oh goodness. yes. i wrote something like this for school, and i literally said the same thing. (i just found it on my computer.) "When I walk into the store with my sister on my hip, I want her to be seen as my sister, not the sin they speculate I committed." that's crazy how similar our lines are!
it's hard. it really is, because you don't know what's going through people's minds and you just want to stand up and explain. tell them that it's your brother or your sister. maybe not by blood, but by love and life. adoption is such a crazy, amazing, hard thing. keep posting about it, girl!!

Anonymous –   – (January 18, 2013 at 1:42 PM)  

Do you sometimes go out and feel the opposite? People smile and admire? Or just judge? What area do you live in for people to staring and judging like that? how sad.

Brad Weisman  – (January 21, 2013 at 8:18 AM)  

Emma, no matter how hard it may seem sometimes, you must remember that the world may judge itself silly, but it doesn't really matter; If what you are doing please God, that's all that matters...

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