BROKENHEARTED

With my mom working with birthmoms, we are now around so much hurt and brokenness and diversity that it is sometimes so surreal... I have so many wakeup calls.

Tonight, there is a woman with her two young children sleeping in the airport so that she doesn't have to sleep in the park.  

Hear me, friends.  A young woman with two young children.  Both still in diapers.  Her home is a park.  What are we doing, friends?  As pro-life... as Christians... who are we and what are we doing for those in need?  Sometimes, it is not always giving money... most of the time... it is Loving.  W/ a capitol L.  

And I am sitting here in my perfect home complaining because we currently have a security guard outside my home... all because we had electrical problems and now have an exposed wire that apparently needs guarding.  I was out of power (out of A/C in 100+ heat) for three hours recently and it drove me insane.  All while a woman with two young children is sleeping in an airport tonight so she won't have to sleep in the park.  

Recently we had another birthmom in our home for the dinners we always do with the adoptive families and her.  She sat on the bar in the kitchen, looking around, saying over and over, "You have such a beautiful house." & "Your house is so big."  In our community, our house is not the biggest.  It has so many imperfections that we want to see this way or that way.  But to have these people come into our lives that are used to living in 1 bedroom apartments with who knows how many people... wow.  

And to hear tonight that someone is sleeping in the park every night absolutely broke my heart.  Not only for her... but for the way in which I live my life. 

It takes huge wake up calls and eye-openings 

from only the Lord to get you to the place where you literally say to yourself... 

oh.  Wow.  I cannot believe I live in this way.  

I cannot believe I complain about everything all the time.

I used to think only Africa could open my eyes and help me to see things with a different view.  Little did I know so much was living right in my own backyard... so much hurt and so much brokenness needs love from me and the light from Jesus.  

And it hits you... like nothing else, sometimes.  What in the entire world?  That God would choose to place me in this spot at this time with these people.  My life becomes a whole lot of me-centered jealousy until I am once again pointed to the Cross.  I do not deserve any of this.  

And as my baby brother sits in the bath tonight... with a full belly and clean clothes... I am reminded once again.  This woman's sweet babies have probably not had a bath in days.  Let alone a place to rest their heads at night.  Absurdity.  I am out of my mind grieved for these people.  

What I have is much, what I need is less.  I am beyond blessed beyond anything imaginable.  Speechless tonight and brokenhearted for those that have nothing.  Lord knows I needed this story to transform me.  Pray.  Give.  Love.  <3 div="">